I got home from work last night at 10pm to my daughter telling me that there was a death in our friend circle.
One of her friends had lost a sister, a beautiful young, vibrant girl had taken her own life.
Every time I hear of someone in our lives passing I have an immediate feeling of despair and pain in my chest. I know it is a normal reaction to death, but since losing my own son in tragic circumstances I am instantly taken to the emotion of such a loss. I feel all the same grief and pain that I personally encountered for the people involved.
The parents of this amazing human being had found their daughter and whilst the details are not mine to share or mine to know, there are some things in life none of us want to ever have to live through, and this is one.
This young woman had only just begun her journey, she woke up and made a decision to not see another morning, for whatever reason this poor angel felt that the world was too heavy, the burdens too great and she couldn’t see the good that she could bring to others, but in her death she will bring waves of change, without even realizing she will have an affect on any or all that ever taunted or bullied her, this death will bring with it great remorse for the actions of others. You see there is no way that anyone who made this child’s life miserable will not somehow hold onto this death and moving forward think about their actions.
In turn her friends will feel this deeply and they will carry into their futures the story of the beautiful girl that was too good a soul for the world. They will tell their children and group of friends about the girl that took her own life because she couldn’t see that light at the end of the tunnel. There will be a lesson that ripples through the ages and perhaps in old age when they take that final breath they will re-unite with her and live on in peace.
I know there are many that think of suicide as a cowardly thing to do, and a terrible act to bestow on your family and friends, but for me all I see is the pain that can transport someone to a place where they feel there is no other way out.
I cannot imagine harming myself to such a degree that the end comes, that my heart stops and yet we are seeing this all too often. How cruel a world do we live in? When the only option our children see to escape torment is ending their own life?
Before your children go off to school remind them to be kind and grateful, remind them to help others, don’t let them pick on others or judge others, be the example and help us make a change.
That child you see who tries too hard to get the attention of others, the one that lies and perhaps steals or tells stories of sexual exploits at a young age to gain peer respect and awe is maybe a lost soul seeking love and acceptance in a place of uncertainty. As I have always said to my own children, Take your shoes off and step into their lives for a moment….don’t just judge from the outside..
Rest now beautiful girl, be at peace in a better place that isn’t heavy on your heart. Know that you are eternally loved and know that your death is not the end but the beginning of incremental change in the way we all think.
To the family of this now angel, know that the fog will stay for a while but eventually it will lift and the memories made in moments will make you smile again.
Before that last breath my friends
Smile, Breath deep and be so grateful xx