Being a Mum is hard. I know we hear that a lot, but it is true, we worry, fuss, argue and manage the lives of a person that has no idea of the enormity of the job at hand.
I have been criticized by my daughter lately for being too involved in her life and on reflection she is right. Not only am I on the edge of empty nest syndrome, I have no actual life of my own other than work and study and her life is so much more appealing and makes me feel involved and young again.
It is hard to stay quiet when comments are made, it is hard not to question, a look or a smile that is a result of a text or snap.
More over it is hard to watch the mistakes be made, and not interject with advice, as she has told me before, she has to make the mistakes herself to learn. This week has been especially hard as my beautiful girl started out in tears, a boy ofcourse has broken her trust and they are now no longer talking. This boy was very important to her, the one person she could trust and confide in, only to end in lies and pain. I want so badly to fix it, I want to make her world right, but she is her fathers daughter, tough, brutal and unwavering in her decision. Once she makes a decision, she is firm on its delivery.
Lately I have watched the saga that is teenage life, I have had boys turn up and just as quickly leave, I have heard names in hushed conversation and I have asked too many probing questions. I don’t know if I am alone in this, but I want my daughter to be loved, I want her to have someone in her life that she can rely on and know with abject certainty will be there regardless of what life throws at her. I want her to experience that type of relationship, but first I want her to know that she doesn’t need that person, she can be on her own and happy, she can be a success without someone else, she can be amazing without a partner but when she is ready traveling this life with someone is far better than doing it alone.