Spare a thought for those with no one

Writing a little bit about life everyday is a great way to release your thoughts. I have kept a diary for many years and whilst it has been some 10 years since this diligence halted, I have always had a strong desire to pen the thoughts in my mind, that blank page deal is still appealing to me.

So my thoughts for today circle around those that are alone, after watching a SBS program on an elderly lady that had died some 6 months prior and had not been found, left alone she had actually decomposed to such a degree that the milk in the fridge was the easiest way to estimate time deceased.

I never want to be that lady. I never want to be so alone that I die and no one notices. While I am no longer afraid of death itself, I really loath that awful feeling of loneliness, that day on day emptiness, it erodes every corner of your mind and the desolation is all encompassing.

So how do we do something to stop this happening, how do we change a society that is determined to become more self absorbed, more involved in Social Media then what is happening next door (unless the gossip of next door is on Facebook)

There has to be a way to reach out to these lonely individuals that no longer feel they have someone, Christmas makes these feelings all the more dire, there are so many sad people, and the saddest thing still is that they become so used to the routine of their life that they actually no longer know how to speak to the neighbors, or involve themselves in the community in which they live. They isolate themselves eventually and then the habit becomes a cage for the remainder of their lives.

We need a new initiative, release from the guilded cage or something of the like, to help those that have forgotten how to help themselves, a safe place where they do not need to feel like they may become a victim of scams or treated like a no body.

I have broached the idea of a teenage cafe in Warwick, a place for the youth to hang out in an environment that is inviting to them. A place to display their art, use their musical talent to perform at open mic events. Read in quiet corners or do live skits, whatever it is that they feel comfortable doing but is solely for the younger generation.

This idea along with a safe place for those with no one else are my 2 focal ideas for the future. The two groups that most need our help and most need our attention, respect and appreciation.

How do you approach people and make them feel at ease so that they know you just want to be a friend, how do you break the ice so that they feel comfortable and at ease? That is the next thing I need to look at. Unfortunately I think there is a stigma behind the foundations that help out those in need, it caters for the lower socioeconomic group in the community, places like lifeline and st Vincent de Paul are mainly available to those that need financial assistance or clothing and furniture at super cheap prices, the stigma associated does not openly allow for everyday people to feel comfortable in their shops, so if I don’t feel comfortable, how would an elderly person go trying to work out who they could befriend when they feel they have no one, if they cant go to the groups that are there to help, where can they go?

Obviously this is just my conjecture, I have no evidence to base these assumptions on, I just have the perspective from them outside looking in.

I want to ask you all to look around and really see who is around you, who may need help, or a friend or just a kind word in passing. This could very well be the only contact that person has all day, or the only civil communication in a while. I suppose if we all do it there wont be so many people dying alone and not being found until they have all bar faded from the surroundings.

Live your Truth

Smile and Breath Deeply, for this is a beautiful life.

Life is Great….Share your story

It has been a very busy time for everyone coming into Christmas, teenage parties and crazy work hours. It is a great time of year for me, I love Christmas, it really is a magic time of year. I was at work last week and caught myself smiling widely at the look on the faces of the kids running up to Santa Claus. That innocence is second to none.

I have not been as diligent on my blogs as I have normally tried to be, in an interview today I actually caught myself admitting that I was in a fantastic place in my life, everything was finally going well and I was feeling more apart of the Warwick community which in turn has lessened my anxiety and uncertainty along with my self esteem being quite high now that I am working.

I have laid out the issues that were weighting down my soul, I have put out the feelings towards family and people that I felt hurt me greatly and I have owned my part in these problems and now I am moving forward, like awakening from a nightmare I feel like a balloon free to float away and experience and enjoy my life.

I want to always live my truth. I want to be open and honest with all I meet and in doing so I hope others will do the same.. All my life I repeated the mantra…a problem shared is a problem halved…and I have been fortunate enough to do just that…and it works. From the lowest of lows some months ago to now I am a completely different person.

I have finally reconciled the life I once led and am ready to really enjoy this time ahead.

I want to encourage you all to share your stories, because as I have said before, there are so many people who think they are alone in this world, and the reality is we have a wealth of people who are or have suffered just as we have. Reaching out and sharing a part of yourself can save a life literally. The depth of depression I reached made me question life and this blog has helped beyond imagining.

Merry Christmas to you all

Live your truth

Smile and Breath Deeply xxx

We are forgetting to enjoy Christmas ..

The Christmas nightmare is starting to roll here in Warwick, I suppose because I am on the other end of a checkout I see the manic behaviour, hear the stories of money woes and the lament of those that are yet to begin their Christmas shopping..of which I am one.

I am yet to make a dent on the present hunt that is required to fulfill at least my immediate family needs.

I have to make sure that I cover all bases, double check who I am likely to run into and have back up chocolates on hand to give to the odd guests that appear last minute, unfortunately I don’t really feel as though it is a reciprocated measure anymore. The constant comment is being made that without children Christmas is a hollow time of year. I suppose that is true, the sound of children laughing and playing is the best part of Christmas, being woken early to Santa came is one of the memories I will always hold dear.

One day I hope to experience it again with grandchildren, until then I will content myself with the gorgeous faces of the children I see when they happen upon Santa in the Shopping centre.

Just yesterday Santa visited the centre and I found myself so completely besotted with the sound of the bell he chimed and the jolly Ho Ho Ho, it took me back to being a kid myself and that is a memory that I will forever be grateful that I have.

You see it seems to me that we are changing so much in todays society, we are putting Santa aside to pay bills and just survive in some cases, we are so scared for our children of potential pedophiles that we are taking away the pure joy and pleasure that Santa and in turn Christmas can bring. Instead we focus on the negative, the cost, the waste, the spoiling, the toys that break in minutes and the food bill that seems astronomical.

It is without a doubt the most wonderful time of the year if we could all just see and embrace that small fact.

Let’s take it back to the basics …

Getting together with family

Enjoying a meal together and finding our Grateful moments to savior in the years to come.

Smile and Breath deep everyone

Merry Christmas x

The Countdown has begun

School is just about done for 2017 and in my house that means, dinners, assemblies and wrangling out of the last day …

Not only are we on the countdown for school, but Christmas is now 34 days away and before then we have 2 teenage parties, work and the associated social engagements of a 16 year old.

Now my days consist of forward thinking to when my child, the last one in the home is going to be self sufficient and have her P’s so that she will be able to drive herself everywhere without the need for me to be Uber Mum. This thought fills me with joy but at the same time dread because then…What ?? If I am not needed for lifts and I don’t get to have conversations daily on the way to and from school, how will I ever know what is going on in my child’s life, after all it is terribly hard to get a conversation out of a teenager through a closed bedroom door …

You know I make it sound rather dramatic, I make it sound like living with a teenager is like living in a funeral parlor, whilst I do it for laughs, I am mostly being very honest. Snapchat and Facebook have taken away my beautiful girl and replaced it with a child that should wear a helmet when leaving the house Incase she crashes into something whilst eyeballs deep on her phone ..

This beautiful child that laughs sporadically and may look like a deranged looney to a stranger watching her bizarre facial expressions.

The only way I can combat this is to become one of the people she snaps and messages, thats right I have to become super cool Uber Mom and fly just low enough that she throws me the odd scrap to make me feel included. At least her friends seem to like me.

Fingers crossed I can maintain a safe distance and remain in the circle of friends and not end up on the blocked list.

Smile and breath Deeply Everyone

Live Your truth

Everyone has a story…you just need to listen

When did we become so jaded?

Yesterday was a day to feel grateful for me, I was fortunate to get a couple through my checkout with a story that would make you cry ( I almost did ) . The husband in a wheelchair had suffered a stroke and could not talk but could communicate perfectly well with hand signals and acknowledgement of conversation. The gorgeous wife had been diagnosed with Cancer at the beginning of 2017, so 12 months on and they continue to battle through the cards they have been dealt, but they were both so happy and purely grateful that they had woken up that morning. In typical me form I had to give them both a hug, their story touched me deeply, they made me feel in a single interaction that I had a world of grateful in my life, and I am truly truly lucky..TODAY

None of us know what tomorrow will bring, we all hear that don’t we, it is spouted from every angle and the older we get the more that is very true, unfortunately I shared this story with other staff and was confronted with a barrage of negativity, the off hand comments that ‘ I’ll get over that quick enough’, ‘work here long enough and you will have heard it all’, ‘you’ll want to put them out of their misery soon enough’. What has happened to our society? are our own issues too great to see those around us, are we forgetting that there is always someone suffering far more than us ? In that moment in my lunch room, I pushed my chair back from the table and I exhaled the attitudes and I stayed silent, I had hit a wall and I am determined to not try and change the thinking of those in that mindset, I am determined to stay the person I am, the empathetic, kind and caring person that I know I am. Is it to my detriment that I feel this way? I see on a daily basis at work elderly people who have no one and go home to a quiet and lonely life, the same as the one I was living that drove me to deep depression. If I had a mission it would be to make sure no one felt that depth of loneliness ever again, but that is far too great a mission for one person. How do I reach the people that need company and are skeptical of opening their hearts to it, in a world where the elderly are taken advantage of more than loved and cared for.

It’s not only the elderly though, its the disabled as well, the misunderstood with their big smiles and open hearts, the wheelchair bound and those burdened with a twisted body but a mind in tact.

I watch as people roll their eyes or avoid them, I watch as they look on in disgust when they have to wait a little longer for those with delays to process their orders on the checkout. I see the way they are deemed in our society, I have witnessed the carers seemingly at their wits end dealing with their charges, and I question why they bother to do this job, jobs aren’t always about the money, we have to stop and realize that to take on a position we have to embrace it for the position not the financial means it supplies us.

Today we need to embrace our jobs, we need to look at what the job is about and emulate what is required. I may now be a checkout operator, but that duty to me includes being open, friendly and available for the customer, it includes having an understanding nature and being able to deal with a diverse range of people, attitudes and ailments. You know what? I love it and I’m bloody good at it. Out of the 50 or more customers I serve in a shift, I try to enhance their day in some way, if they are tired, sick, lonely, happy, busy, distracted, I try and help them to enjoy the moment.

If we all change the thought pattern of someone everyday, if we all practice grateful, loving interactions we can change the world we live in one smile at a time.

Smile and Breath Deeply Everyone

Live your truth and share your love x

Working my way to the couch ….

Sometimes what we need most in life is the understanding that it is OK….Ok to be who you are, OK to exercise or not, OK to be highly educated or not, OK to go for a walk, look through a shop, just be…thats OK.

There are so many expectations on us, there are so many hills to climb and people to please and chores to do and work to be done that in the moments where we just want to be…US, we find it increasingly harder to set aside this time.

So I am reading and finding a new way to be OK and just be… I am learning what is good for my body so that it transfers to my mind and then in turn can flow into my life.

I have a habit of getting very excited about the possibilities of life and I go into it all head on and cant wait to see where it takes me, only to fizzle out down the track because my mind creates road blocks, either I tell myself I am not smart enough or I tell myself I am fine the way I am, why do I need to eat healthy and exercise, after all people should like me for who I am…right? Well the problem with that thinking is, it only hurts me in the end, I am the one that doesn’t finish what I start and I am the one that has to live in a fat, unfit shell with a mind that is trying to make it OK.

Reality for me and me alone is that I have to do whatever I have to do to make myself ok. I have to be able to look after myself because there isn’t anyone else on my path and living my life.

ITs funny, my husband spends a lot of time on the couch when he is in Warwick and he justifies this with 1. Nothing else to do 2. I worked hard all week or 3. I don’t feel great.

That couch has more hours of his body wear than anyone else in the house and I often sit and think about the time he spends there, it frustrates me, it makes me cranky because…A part of me wants to be free to do that too. A big part of me would like to lie on the couch all day for days on end and just be a sloth, but a sloth with no guilty thoughts running through my head. You see because my brain will not shut off I have a constant dialogue running, the day is an endless possibility to get things done before bedtime comes around again. There is washing, ironing, spots on walls, vacuuming, gardening, mowing, cleaning of all kinds, cars to wash, dogs to be walked, going to the gym or swimming, practicing the clarinet, coloring, crafts, journaling…cooking, the list is literally endless. My mind works in such a way that I need to achieve as much as possible in the day to reward myself when I get home, with the couch!

Smile and Breath Deep Everyone

Live your truth xx

Changing my thoughts ….

Never Give Up, Live with Passion, Be Confident, Learn something new everyday

When you start to read the works of our leaders and those that have succeeded these are the consistent messages in the pages of their books.

We do not want to live a life of mediocrity, that is the truest and yet hardest statement because 95% of the population do.

As I have said all the way through my blog, I am so normal its almost embarrassing, I don’t see myself as extraordinary or capable of greatness on a daily basis, but that mind set is where we go wrong, we all have the potential to be great, we are just happy to settle for what we have, its easier, its possible and its normal.

5% of the population are working everyday to achieve at a higher level, I am flawed by that figure, here I am trying to inspire my children to reach higher and achieve goals and be successes in their own right, but as I read and learn I know it is a process that we need to be sharing and nurturing in our children from birth, not as they reach the end of their high school education. We need to be giving them the tips and advice and strategies to become this pinnacle human, we as a society are being dumbed down. As my husband always says, an uneducated society is an easily led society.

A bit like, its easy to lead in fear, when people are scared they are looking for leadership and direction, when there is chaos there is an opportunity for control.

So what is the answer? Or should I say where do we begin?

It has to start with positivity

Go to bed telling yourself you are going to wake up ready to start a new day, you will be well rested and looking forward to tomorrow.

Waking up and telling yourself this is going to be a great day .

These 2 simple things seem so crazy right? But so easy, we set our day in motion with our thoughts, we set our sleep in motion with our thoughts, so if we can consistently change our thoughts and upgrade them if you will, we can ultimately change our thinking and in turn we change our lives….

I dare you to change just one thing and test if it works for you. This is the second morning I have woken up at 5am, actually it was 4.45am and I fell asleep quickly last night, waking up ready to start this process again, I look forward to the process if you can imagine that. Just 2 days ago I would wake up and want to stay in bed, but I am changing my mindset.

I am going to reprogram my thoughts, I am going to try harder to achieve the things I feel I can’t …

Today, each moment I am becoming empowered, I am positive and I believe in myself ..

Smile and Breath Deeply

And remember to live your truth ..

Miracle Morning …. A chance encounter with a book on a shelf

The easiest part of my new daily routine is journaling to release all the thoughts in my mind.

I have been fortunate enough to stumble across a book that is already changing me for the better, I am no stranger to self help books and diets and thought provoking dialogue that is intended to change me into the dynamic person I know I am capable of being, but as yet, other then strong positive affirmations I have found it hard to stick to any of them.

Something about the title and the purpose of this book however grabbed me and drew me In.

I am now seeking someone to join me and become my buddy on this journey, someone that has my back and I will have theirs to make sure we stick to this new lifestyle and become the best version of ourselves. Now I know in that one sentence I have lost half my readers, but wait and hear me out, this book is pretty quick and easy to read, but its message is so powerful you literally can finish it in a sitting, actually that may be an exaggeration. I have not yet finished it, but I am so excited to keep reading, which I honestly haven’t done enough of lately.

I know through my Tony Robbins Audiobooks I should be reading as much as I can, because the road to greatness comes from education and education can come from so many sources, but there are so many people who have gone before us and written down their ways to succeed and grow and be our best selves that we would be foolish to not read them.

I am making it a habit to write down the books that are recommended or mentioned in texts that I read, when I am listening to someone that has succeeded and is now financially and emotionally free I want to learn as much as I can about their mindset and their experience so that I too can become free in every aspect of my life.

Today is the first day, so if you want to jump onboard with me, let me know or check out, I truly would love an accountability partner and cant wait to see where we end up in this journey we are all on.

P.S. My love of stationery led me into Kikki K yesterday and this book is the outcome.

Smile and Breath Deeply

Live your truth

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